Sometimes in some of my classes, a personal question is asked of us where my writing life is relevant. For example, in my Creative Writing class today we were talking about motivation. My teacher was explaining to us how a character’s motivation is what makes a book exciting, and what makes the reader want to read a book. He then proceeded to go around the room and ask us where we see ourselves in one year.
When it came to be my turn to speak, I said I wanted to be on a small book tour for my third book. It was an answer I sort of came up with on the spot. I’d like to have my fourth book published by one year from now. However, he then asked us what our motivation was for wanting it. What was our reason behind wanting our one year goal. I told him I essentially wanted public recognition as an author, and to know that my hard work was paying off.
After that, he asked the class which of our stories they would want to read about, and one student said mine. This made me feel pretty good; knowing that someone is interested in my life as a writer. However, I couldn’t help but think that some people thought I was bragging. I didn’t receive any strange looks, or hear any whispers, but even my teacher said that an undergraduate going on a book tour is a pretty uncommon thing.
I’m very much not trying to brag when I do bring up that I have written two books, am working on my third, and don’t plan on stopping. I’m merely stating true fact. But, I just can’t help but feel like people are judging me for what I do. A lot of writers that I know are older than I am. This leads me to believe that being both young and a writer are very uncommon things.
I’m operating under the assumption that I’m just being ridiculous. I can only assume that people aren’t judging me when I bring up my life as a writer. I mean, whenever I bring it up to an individual person I’m having a conversation with they always seem to be quite thrilled or impressed. However, something seems to change when I bring it up in a classroom. Something in me forces me to think that just because I’m a writer and I openly bring it up that I’m subject to ridicule and assuming glances.
Has anyone else ever been in a similar situation? Do you often feel as though people are judging you solely on the fact that you’re the only writer in the room?